Tuesday, March 8, 2011

35 Conferette : EXPOSED - Interview with 35c Top Cock Jaime-Paul Falcon

It was this gentleman reporter's pleasure to conduct a discourse with Denton's Top Cock, Jaime-Paul Falcon, over a generous serving of tapioca pudding with crisped mint spears. He demonstrated his rare mastery of the English language, as well as an encyclopedic knowledge of internet videos. "JPF", as he is sometimes known, was quite patient with the under-aged and under-skilled waitstaff. Our discussion unfolded thusly:

HB: You were a controversial topic amongst the internet users of 2010. Do you plan on keeping a lower profile this year?


HB: Is it pronounced "Falcon" like the bird, or "Falcone" like the murdered Italian judge?

It's pronounced "Smith", I think....not to sure, it really depends on if I'm in Mexico or the US....in Canada it's "Robertson".

HB: What is an El Kabong?


HB: Is it better to be loved or feared?

I like to cuddle, so I'm gonna go with feared.

HB: Hypothetical: You rejected my band's application to play the 35 Conferette. I confront you in an alley. What do you do?

Would you like a beer?

HB: Was Mister Heavenly booked because of their quality music or because they will bring Michael Cera to town, and Michael Cera sells wristbands?

Who is Micheal Cera, why the hell do people keep mentioning this guy to me? All these Cera questions have been keeping me from devoting my full attention to Astros spring training updates (we might not suck this year!)

HB: What kind of police presence can the well-intentioned people of Denton expect to see at the festival?

Ever seen the Battle of Seattle, it'll be the complete opposite of that.

HB: How many Paperstain day shows will you be attending this year?

Honestly, it depends on the times, we have bands playing outside during those shows and it's gonna be hard to pick between someone like G Side on our stage and whatever act will be there, so all of them.

HB: I see that bands won't be playing at Boiler Room/Abbey Underground this year. Is that because everybody hated it?

We regrettably didn't book Oso Closo or Snarky Puppy, so Boiler Underground decided they didn't want to be apart of this. Preferably in the port'o'pottys, but if someone is busy fucking in one, mosey over to Abby Underground

HB: If I attend the 35 Conferette, where will I use the bathroom?

Preferably in the port'o'pottys, but if someone is busy fucking in one, mosey over to Abby Underground.

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